It's now 9:35 and i'm kind of depress bec i'm around with some people that are down and it's kind of making me feel down as well. I don't like that what so ever. So i went out for supper with Joe and it alright. But this morning my eye was not right and so i had to go to the Hospital and that wasn't fun at all. Umm so it's that bad that i can't got to school for acomple of days so ya. I can't work but hopefully it will go away. I'm right now listening to the song called orange sky. My dream is to have more freinds and always be around and have lot's of fun. But we can't have that much fun bec i live in deep river. What can i do. Umm i'm hopeing that i get to live in Pembroke in the summer or by spring so i can't wait until than. I'm so excited and moving on with my live. Another thing that i'm not looking forward to is that my other very close family are going to move and i'm going to take that very hard and i now it. And i'm so fucken afaired that that things will go bad like i mean very bad and i'm so scared. I'm crying out for help and shy to talk about it to others or my family. Like it took along time for me to be here and i don't want to fuck it up. This is my last change and so be it. I'm back at school and umm there's not to to much to say about it for now. For some reason i feel like cutting and seeing my blood ran down and i can't bec i stoped one of my freind from cutting and i'm so proud of her. I can't ask for more from her. She is doing well. I hope that i get something out of school and not fucken wasting my fucken time. I feel like deiting everyday and for all the things i wanted and i have and i just can't be sadisfied what so ever and i'm fucken mad about that. My mind talks to me even though i don't waant it to. Night time is the worse bec something happed to me a very long time and it was at night and i still feel the perecents around me. I don't really talk about this but for some reson i think there's someone going to read this and support me and turely understand me of where i'm coming from. Byess and have a good night my freinds.....God Bless ......

Hey there i had a good thanx giving. I saw kate wilks and that was very nice. We went for a long walk and talked some more ect... I mover in to another house right in chalk river and right now i'm kind of sad and happy at the same time. The reason i've moved out for awhile is to get some help about some thing. Things are going to be better everyday and when God is with me. I'm improving alot playing my giutar and making my own songs that i want to play in the year 20007 at the summerfest so ya hopefully it will all work out in the long ran. Sometimes i feel lot's of perpure bec i want lot's of help from my close freinds. It's very differnt when i don't want help from others weird. I'm still going out with sam eills and he's making a differce in my life trying to confence myself that someone loves me. Ya i'm still having a very hard time when others say I LOVE YOU. One day i will be feel like a bird flying anywhere where the wings take. So i can't wait until than. Will i got to work the next day and buess for now...... xoxooxoxxoxxox

hey there what's up guys. Well everything is going well. but something happend to my good freind and so he came up. We talked all about it. So now he's doing well once again and i'm so glad. it's 11:12 and i'm not treid what so ever. Hopefully tomorrow i will being doing something. i might get my clothes clean just to do something you know... Well I'm getting matter of eating ect.... Byess for now....

Yeah it is 12:12 a.m and i did something wrong. I new what i was doing. But i never seem to learn a lessson for some reason.I feel very bad about myself. I feel really depress and wanting to cutting my arms and ect.... I don't know if god well for give me once again. I guess i have to me a strong person you now. I had a very bad week and the weekend. It's going to be a good week for me bec i am going to let it. I have to just go with flow and take it from their. It's hard for me to explain what the fuck i'm trying to say. Fuck? Well nothing happening in Deep River. I wish there more too do. I phone one of my freind and we talked about it than ya. I still felt like cutting my armes. But if i do that than i will hurt everyone around even my parents. The went through alot bec of me. I'm just affert if i go back through a depression. Apart of me wants to and the other side dosen't want to. So how can conrtol my mind and not having to worry about it all the time. I get really influines really easy and don't know how to say No? Or don't know when to stop. Wel

When i come to the end of the road
And the sun has set for me,
I want no rites in a gloom filled room.
Why cry for a soul set free?


Miss me - But not to long
And not with your head bowed low.
Remember the love that we once shared,
Miss me - But let me go


For this is a journey that we all musttake
And each must go alone.
It's all part of the Masters plan,
A step on the road to home.

When you are lonely and sick at heart,
Go to the freinds we know,
And bury your sorrows in doing good deads,
Miss me - But let me go...........

hey there, i worked at B-king and it went well. Umm still sad about things that i wish that i can help. but it's all up to the person and all i can do is to pray and hopefully she will find another way... I went to my freinds house and came back home at 2:00 a.m., so i'm treid right now. I have a doc appointment and hopefully that will go well. My mom is still up north bec she had lsoted her ungle and supporting her mother. I didn't now how much pain that my family is going through right now. it's like i'm around with broken hearts and i wish that i can take it all away. It's like i feel that i'm doing somehting wroung but really i'm not. And i know that? But just being around with broken hearts it's makes feel of not wanting to take my depresstion pills... Well that's all i got to say for the night... Buess for now to the people are reading this....

hey there, one of my freind i just found out is feeling so depress and i wish that i could help her. I didn't if now how much pain she is going though. I'm not going to see her name, but i can give a clue that she was my best bestest freind in the wrold. But i will be there for her and always and always.... Love you girl..... Miss you Lot's............

Hey guys, i had some people over night. One of my freind got sick and i felt very sad. But i had some good talk with clara and she made me feel better about my self and god bless you girl... Love you....

One of my freind got sick and i feel very bad...

Hey guys i went on a trip with my mom. when i was up there, 2 people died so i am feeling depressed and very lonesome.I have to work and it's going to be hard. Well byess for now.....

Hi to all my freinds that are going to read it. It's a raining day and i hate it, what so ever. It makes me feel kind of depress and also i think about the past. I got to go somewhere or take a long walk and fresh my mine once again. Byess for now and have a wounderful day guys........ Alina Williams.....

How do I add new freinds, can anyone tell me and thanx again... buess xoxox

Hey evreyone, i'm new at this thing. It's exciteing for me and to meet new names and faces ect.. So how's your day to the person that is reading my mail.... My day went will, i wasn't working 2-day but i will be working on thur-rates.. Will byess for now alina williams..........xoxoxo